Wave After Wave of Blood Rushes to My Cheeks. Blush!

ups has the oddest customer pick-up procedure.
i don't have the peacoat (and hat) i've been waiting on
because they couldn't leave my package on my doorstep today.
they need a signature upon delivery. sucks!
i came home to find a notice stuck to my door,
on which there are no directions for customer pick-ups.
i called their 800 number.
they said, "give us your phone number.
the local guys'll call you back."
(that's not an exact quote)
fifteen minutes later, the local hub calls.
they said, "you pick up! between 9:00, 9:01! yes?!"
(no, that's a lie)
they said, "sir, you may pick up your package tonight.
it will be ready between 9:00 and 10:00 PM. see you then!"
(that might not be quite right either)
so, uh... yeeeeah! isn't that insane?!
fedex usually has it ready for pick-up 'round 6 at the latest!
effing ups, man.
all of this because i'm too impatient
to wait the entire weekend for a monday delivery. ha!

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