i misplaced my cell phone.
i know where it is actually.
it's still at the lake
i was at this weekend.
luckily, measures were taken
to retrieve said cell phone
and it will be back in my hand soon.
but until then
i'm without any means of communication
besides the wonderful wonderful internet.

collins

dreams of lemons & sporks

re: re: dreams of lemons & sporks
your argument is logical and valid, dear cousin.
but i must remind you that it was only a dream.
dreams aren't logical. aren't supposed to be.
they exist in your brain/mind. in their own
infinite universe/dimension/reality/space.
a logical dream would be quite boring!

and then there're nightmares. most of which
aren't based on anything logical whatesoever!
(e.g. big scary monsters, bunnies, etc.)

but i digress... what i mean to say is this:
my dreams have lemon trees that produce lemons
and sporks! lemon-flavored, spork-shaped sporks! yeah!

your favorite cousin

—michael

You are admired by many.

(from fortune cookie)

cools & replenishes /254g

i missed your call
i missed everything.
i missed your call.
i missed sushi.
i'm sorry!

fuck, i'm hungry!

i feel like shit today.
mentally and physically.
i napt most of the afternoon.
i decided i'm going to start using 't',
instead of 'ed' for past tense purposes.
like just now when i wrote napt, instead of napped.

i wish i had a car,
so's i could go to in-n-out.
they stay open until 1am or something.
although they don't sell sushi.
i had my heart set on sushi
so bad too. you know though,
they may sell sushi and just don't tell people.
they have that secret menu you can order stuff from.
animal-style sushi would be interesting.

i'm hungry!
i'm going to eat my left arm.
but just the inside part, so people walking next to me won't know.

i'm gonna walk to in-n-out.

—michael

Outside of Sutter Laundromat

Man w/Mobile Phone Needs to Get Out Mahway

i was at the laundromat earlier,
sitting outside to people-watch
and flip through the new issue of dwell
when i realized that i didn't know where my ipod was.
i haven't used it since it started dying on me. it's old.
bought it in 2001. that's right, 2nd generation. early adoptor, that's me.
the new nanos are eye candy for eyes with a sweet... tooth.
anyway, so where the hell is my ipod?!

the one with no arms

Baldness or Killing Them with Kindness

the old man with the freshly shaved scalp
told me that i should start shaving my head
—instead of buzzcutting it like i do—
so my bald spot can't be noticed.
my first thought was to tell him
"you're a rude old man
who needs to mind his own business"
instead i took the high road and
told him that i really don't give a shit
that my bald spot is showing
but i didn't say the shit part and
i guess that's not really the high road
is it?

5 May

(a brief discussion took place at dinner in a thai restaurant)

It's really coming down outside," she said.

I turn and look. "Wow! It sure is. Hopefully it'll let up before we leave."

"I like that saying... and people that say it." She lowered her tone and said it again, "Boy, it's really coming down outside!"