modern dancer

dreams of dancers last night.


i was working at a coffeehouse again and
we were auditioning dancers to work at the coffeehouse.
i'm not sure why, but we were. and i was there to... judge?
i'm not sure of that either, but i was there, sitting at the
head of the table. i had the knowledge and confidence of a
knowledgeable and confident judge of dancers.


the best part. her.


the. best. part. her. she.


she was the in-between auditioners entertainment.
she slowly walked to the middle of the floor and performed
the most graceful and elegant dance i'd ever seen. her expression
was serious and full of emotion. you could feel the warm energy.
like waves or pulses of warm, buzzy, goodness.
before you know it, she was done and
the next auditioner was up.
i only saw her dance once,
i knew she'd dance again.
and again. and again.


dreams are dreams are dreams.

then, the ocean

the ocean beckoned and i came a-coming.


i skipped yoga, because i felt it was okay.
i wouldn't feel guilty about missing one day of practice--
seeing as how i've been going twice a day lately. so, instead
of grabbing my mat and yogitoes, i grabbed a couple of cameras,
a bottle of water and i was out the door. i briskly walked toward
the train station, but i was 20-blocks away and only had 10-minutes
to catch the next train. missed the first one. i stopped and bought
a coffee, sat down and chilled for a bit in the morning sunlight.
i checked my email and checked my voicemail.


unbeknownst to me, she called my three times
and texted another three times. my phone had been turned off,
because i hate when phones go off in the middle of yoga practice.
i listened to her messages several times, as i was not quite awake.
i tried to make sense of the timeline in which she sent them. apparently,
it was throughout the latter half of the day. realizing this, i suddenly felt
sorry that i wasn't able to reply sooner. i sat in my thoughts for a moment,
but couldn't stay put for long, the next train was due to leave in
30-minutes. barely made it aboard. i had to run for it.
literally. it's actually one of my simple pleasures.
it's how one should board a train; running after it
and hopping aboard just as the train begins
to pull away from the platborm.


i called her a couple of times
on my run to catch the train. no answer. voicemail.
i can't remember what i said. my mind was a whirlwind.
i worried that my legs weren't long enough to get to the train on time.
i walked light and quickly.


all i could think about was her. i felt uncomfortable.
a day earlier, i felt comfortable. i thought we were in a good place.
but somehow, i had burdened her with something heavy enough to
cause a need for her to contact me throughout the day.
a 2.5-hour road track trip with her.


i found myself walking through golden gate park,
trying to be lost. lose my mind in the trees. it worked.
something about the smell of wilderness. makes me think of childhood.
good times. carefree. now, as adults, life weighs down on us,
until we need to escape back to the good times.
good memories.


i exited the park on the west end.
never thought i'd find it. a few times i thought maybe
i was being tracked by a mountain lion. absurd right, a mountain lion
in golden gate park. maybe. maybe not.
homeless people sound like
mountain lions inside
urban parks.


the beach.



then, the ocean.



all was right.

so... i'm waiting

I went to the Apple Store today
with the intention of purchasing one of them there
shiny, new iPhone 4s, but I knew, in the back of my head,
that there was no way in hell there'd be any left.

As I approached the store, in the middle of the f#cking mall,
I could first sense, then see that it was pretty much
packed in there. Like sardines.

So, I am without an iPhone 4. I am without any phone,
for that matter. My one-year old Blackberry is
on it's last legs. Or so I assume, cause it
won't turn on! Well, it did,
then it didn't again.
I'm done with it.

I put my name on the waiting list at the Apple Store.
The dude with the iPad, taking names and emails,
told me they'll be receiving "shipments of
one-hundred, every few days". I asked
him how many people are waiting.
He said "several hundred".
So... I'm waiting.

• • •

running thoughts (or get your act together man, pt. ix)

it was my birthday on sunday.
ah, yes, yet another year has passed.
happy birthday to me! happy birthday to me!


i organized a birthday bowling party with all of my workmates.
white russians were imbibed with irony.
balls were bowled with inaccuracy.
and tons o'fun was had.


and for this,
it was quite a good weekend.
one for the history books.
aka, the blog.


how was your weekend? 

hm?

she and him, in the sun

hooo boy! what a fantastic spring day!
wait, is it spring yet? what'd that gopher tell us?
groundhog, whatever. did he see his shadow? is it still winter?
actually, it really doesn't matter what season it is, it's sunny outside!
and the air is brisk. my favorite, non-wintery kind of weather.
i love it, dammit! if it could stay like this all summer,
i'd... i'd kiss a horse's ass. yeah. literally, kiss it!
no, figuratively! but i'd totally do it!


these blossoms are killing my sinuses,
but they ain't dampened my spirit!


are ya enjoying this weather?

impeccable manners and grace

moss: look, but don't touch. yick!

is entitled to 4 tickets to any show

hello people!
where the eff did february go?
sheesh, that was fast!

ain't it true that
there is absolutely nothing better
than a pot of tea and peanut butter toast.
okay, maybe a pot of tea and nutella toast, but whatevah!
the most important part is the tea.


do you drink tea?